This month has been particularly hectic in my personal life as we’ve been moving to a new apartment. We’re saying goodbye to our studio of 13 years (our first–and until very recently only–home in New York City). So this past week I’ve been feeling extra concerned I’m not delivering enough toward the project. I keep catching myself thinking the semester is basically over and how can I possibly finish everything I want to.

And that is only somewhat true. Yes, the end of the semester is near, but there is still time to make meaningful contributions to the project. I’ve been struggling to put my research into words, and worrying about the multiple presentations that are coming up. How can I present Mapping Cemeteries when it feels like we only just started making it, and we’re still exploring what it is?

But tonight I want to give a huge shout-out to Asma, who has planned out our audio episodes. We recorded the first episode tonight in our group meeting. I’ve never been involved in a podcast before (and I admit I don’t even listen to them much), and I was so nervous. But Asma included this in a list of tips to help us all prepare for tonight’s recording: “You’re the expert of your work in MC, tell imposter syndrome to exit the stage.”

And that’s what it is, imposter syndrome, striking me at almost every step of the process. I saved writing my post until after we recorded tonight, and I’m so glad that I did. When Asma started recording, we all were more than ready. We responded to prompts with care and consideration, and we built meaningful discourse about Mapping Cemeteries. (Everyone in the group has done such great research, and I learned so much about the project even since our last meeting.)

And we built up our little community. Just like we’ve been doing in all of our team meetings. There was a moment when everyone talked about what led them to the project, and that was particularly heart-felt and just a really great reminder of the hard work we are doing even under these prolonged and challenging circumstances we find ourselves in. Thank you so much Asma, lane, Lisa, and Nadia! This project would not be the delicious sourdough bread it is without you (h/t Lisa for that metaphor).

[This entry was originally posted to DHUM 70002 Digital Humanities: Methods and Practices (Spring 2021) in Personal Blogs and tagged mapping cemeteries on April 20, 2021 by Brianna Caszatt.]

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